Has the Lord Jesus Christ returned and got hit by a car?

I really can't LOL at that...I hope th e follow is alright. Maybe he's from England ..yknow they hold aristocratic titles like "duke", "lord", "earl", etc. now the Jesus Christ part I can only imagine that someone was a bit "phariseeic" in nature and felt like they were pregnant with or actually God's son. Pray for him and/or his parents.